Feds take the ‘fun’ out of ‘functional.’ No more silly TxDOT signs.

Traffic signs may not be the most glamorous thing to talk about, but the Texas Department of Transportation has surely added some zing to what was otherwise a dull world – the agency has become famous for its humorous holiday signs urging drivers to drive safe and sober. However, new regulations from a U.S. agency now say signs shouldn’t be humorous or make any pop culture reference. Why can’t we ever have anything nice?

There’s been dozens of iconic signs over the years from Thanksgiving Day rhymes like, “Gobble, gobble go easy on the throttle,” to Christmas Day puns saying “Rudolph is the only one who should be the only one driving lit” – a message aimed at sober driving. But we can bid farewell to those humorous signs that have become a Texas staple all thanks to new regulations from the U.S. Federal Highway Administration. In its 1,100-page manual detailing how signs should be designed, implemented, and crafted, the federal agency says no more humor or pop culture references on those changeable displays.

“A [changeable message sign] should not be used to display a traffic safety campaign message if doing so could adversely affect respect for the sign. Messages with obscure or secondary meanings, such as those with popular culture references, unconventional sign legend syntax, or that are intended to be humorous, should not be used as they might be misunderstood or understood only by a limited segment of road users and require greater time to process and understand. Similarly, slogan-type messages and the display of statistical information should not be used.”

Talk about being a bummer. Now, the federal agency says those messages should be brief and to the point, prioritizing traffic impacts, such as accidents and congestion. The regulations do allow for safety campaign messages, but they’re now meant to be concise, direct, and devoid of humor, puns, or pop culture references. TxDOT officials told MySA those humorous jabs lining Texas highways over the past several years were always tied to a safety message, something they say they’ll continue to promote.

“Our message board signs along Texas highways are a great tool to show important safety information to drivers,” a spokesperson from the TxDOT headquarters in Austin told MySA. “Every message we post includes a safety component and we will continue to do that.”

Now, even messages supporting our local Roadrunners won’t make the cut. We all remember the “Birds up, phones down. Go Roadrunners,” sign that was running, right? Alas, the federal government took away something that’s been an iconic staple of Texas highways for years now. Guess we’ll have to find some other way to entertain ourselves while we’re driving – like focusing on the road or something.

“I hope the guy that writes the funny TxDOT signs is paid well,” one X user tweeted back in 2021. Well, we don’t know how much he makes, but his job certainly just got a lot less fun.